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Quezon City, NCR, Philippines
I am blessed, a songwriter, a musician, an educator, an artist, a SERVANT of GOD, a woman after God's own heart and a princess by heart=)

Sunday, August 11, 2013

LOVE IS


Once upon a time there was an island where all 
the feelings lived; happiness, sadness, knowledge, 
and all the others, including love. One day it was
announced to all of the feelings that the island was
going to sink to the bottom of the ocean. So all the
feelings prepared their boats to leave. Love was the
only one that stayed. She wanted to preserve the 
island paradise until the last possible moment. 
When the island was almost totally under water, 
love decided it was time to leave. She began 
looking for someone to ask for help. Just then
Richness was passing by in a grand boat. 

Love asked, "Richness, Can I come with you on
your boat?"
Richness answered, " I'm sorry, but there is a lot of
silver and gold on my boat and there would be no
room for you anywhere."

Then Love decided to ask Vanity for help who was
passing in a beautiful vessel.
Love cried out , "Vanity, help me please."
"I can't help you", Vanity said, "You are all wet and
will damage my beautiful boat."

Next, Love saw Sadness passing by. Love
said, "Sadness, please let me go with you."
Sadness answered, "Love, I'm sorry, but, I just
need to be alone now."

Then, Love saw Happiness. Love cried out, "
Happiness, please take me with you." But 
Happiness was so overjoyed that he didn't hear
Love calling to him. Love began to cry.

Then, she heard a voice say, "Come Love, I will
take you with me." It was an elder. Love felt so 
blessed and overjoyed that she forgot to ask the 
elder his name. When they arrived on land the 
elder went on his way. Love realized how much 
she owed the elder. Love then found Knowledge 
and asked, "Who was it that helped me?"
"It was Time", Knowledge answered.
"But why did Time help me when no one else
would?" Love asked. Knowledge smiled and with
deep wisdom and sincerity, answered, "Because 
only Time is capable of understanding how great 
Love is." 


WASTED

I'm done being nice and minding other people's feelings!

This time I need to put myself first and start caring about what I really want. I gave up something important more than twice! And sacrificed a lot because I wanted to protect something really precious.

This time it ain't gonna happen again.

Be happy. I hope it lasts. I shouldn't have been too nice, it doesn't mean that I made you happy the last time I was happy too.

You made a choice and so I'm making one too, don't expect that everything would still be the same, this would be the end of everything between you, me and everything else for the first time I think I had wasted my time, what a waste.

Optimism



We’ve all had our share of disappointments in life. We have all been discouraged and have thought of giving up. That reflection that used to stare at you from the mirror, straight in the eye; standing so tall and proud now hangs his head low.



In pain from the betrayal of people you used to trust and vowed to serve with all your life and might. In anger from not being able to take things into your own hands. In frustration from things not going as you planned them. In shame for your failure to achieve what you came to do.



Discouragement is not an easy thing to deal with. With discouragement comes depression; something that I have come to be fully acquainted with. But the former things; my past hurts and pains has taught me a lot in dealing with discouragement and also with my depression.

Cliche as it may sound, thinking positive still does the trick. Optimism is the key.



Having a clear mind on what to do next can actually help you get through any barrier that disappointment, discouragement and depression burdens you with; that is actually better than letting all the negative things just bury you six feet underground.



But above all, nothing and no one can get us out of all the shitty things that we can get ourselves into except the powerful arms of the one who loves us so much; the one who made us to be more that what we think we can be; the one who begs to disagree when all the world sees you as someone that you’re not; the one who wonderfully and fearfully made you for his purpose…it is our God who got me through…and I believe that He will continue to in the days to come.



So when you feel discouraged, hold on. He who began a good work in you will continue to complete it in you and through you. Do not give up on doing good, especially when you feel like not doing good, for you will receive a great harvest at the right time if you do not give up.

 Press on. You are blessed.

LIVE LIFE. LOVE LIFE!




"When you accept that hurting and healing are part of living, you can give up the fantasy that being thin controls your happiness."

Let's call his name as Superman, and I was crazy in love with him. Every breath he took, every word he uttered seemed as if it was designed to crack my heart open. I wanted to spend my life with him, grow old with him, have more children than Angelina Jolie with him. The only teensy problem was that he didn't feel the same way about me.

I was certain I could persuade him to love me, that he wasn't seeing clearly, that it was my job to show him that we were meant for each other. I was also certain that when I finally lost the 10 pounds I'd been losing and gaining for a hundred years, he'd be smitten.

And so I pulled out all the stops. I developed a sudden fascination for arts (his field), I baked cakes, I dyed my hair medium blonde (his preferred color). And most of all, I starved myself. I ate nothing but Grape-Nuts without milk for six weeks (don't ask). I chipped a few teeth, leached most of the calcium out of my bones, and probably depleted my muscle mass by half, but I did finally lose those 10 pounds. A few months into Project Superman, he fell in love with a size 16 brunette and moved away.

Most of the people are convinced that loves and losses can be titrated in pounds. That if only they were thin or thinner, everyone who didn't love them would love them. Life would be magical, easy, illuminated. In other words, they believe what many of us believe: If we control what we put in our mouths (and the size of our bodies), then we can control everything else. So we spend our lives focused on losing weight, believing that thinness will provide invincible protection from rejection, grief, and sorrow.

But as you probably have already guessed (or experienced firsthand), when you are as thin as you can ever imagine, the people who didn't love you before will still not love you, and the people who did love you before will love you still. People will come, go, leave, and die, no matter how much you weigh.

Talk about busting childhood myths. As children, we all believed that it was in our power to make our parents happy. If our mother was depressed, if our father was absent, if our parents fought incessantly, we were convinced that it was in our power to make things better. It wasn't. But how we self-medicated those hurts with food was, and still is.

"Well, I may not be in a relationship now, but when I get thin, I will find the perfect partner," you give yourself the illusion that you're in control. You may not be happy now, you tell yourself, but someday soon you will make a change and Prince Charming will suddenly show up at your door. You fool yourself into thinking that you have total control over when your unhappiness will end and perfect happiness will begin. And it has something to do with your weight.

How heartbreak can lead to overeating. It's the nature of hearts to break. It's in their job description. When a heart is doing what it's supposed to be doing, it holds nothing back. And sometimes it gets broken.

The hard part of emotional and compulsive eating is that in trying to avoid big heartbreaks, we break our own hearts every day. We eat more than our bodies want, we binge on foods that make us sick, we carry weight that makes it hard to move around. We tell ourselves mean stories about our thighs, our arms, our bellies. The cost of having the "when I am thin, everything will be fine" fantasy is that we end up trading the heartbreak of being alive for the heartbreak we cause ourselves.

And it's all to avoid something that can't be avoided. While we are postponing our joy for a future time when everything will be perfect, life is going on with or without our consent and we are missing it. People come and go, pain comes and goes. But so does joy. And if our hearts are closed because we don't want to suffer, they won't be open enough to recognize the joy as it flies by.

Hearts are made to be resilient. Think about it: Is there one thing that's happened to you that you haven't survived? Here you are, right now, reading this article despite all the heartache you've had in your life. Something in you is still awake, alive, eager to learn, ready to be moved.

And once you know that your heart is resilient, once you accept that part of being here on earth is, as a friend of mine says, living among the brokenhearted, then you can take in the huge streaks of delight, joy, and happiness as well. Once you understand that everything will end, you can finally let your life, the one you already have, not the one you imagine you'll someday lose.

JUST


I find that one thing I dislike the most is being left out.  Come to think of it, I'm not sure if I'm okay being upset about being left out of things.  I mean, technically when I'm invited places I often don't attend...so I get invited fewer places.  That makes sense.  It's logical.  However, I think a lot of the reason I don't attend is because I don't trust people and I feel odd.  I have this innate feeling that there's something wrong in me, or something wrong-er in me than others...like I have a target that people are waiting to pounce.  I doubt it's true, but I can't seem to shake it.  How do you shake that feeling?  Do you just hang out with more people and learn to fake it?  Do you eventually learn to be with people without that feeling at all?  Maybe it takes me getting to know individuals on a one-on-one basis first before I can trust.  I wish I knew.  It sure would save me a lot of trouble!

I mean, what comes first, the chicken or the egg?  Do I get left out because I cause myself to get left out?  Or do I get left out because they left me out first and then I responded by declining further offers to not be left out?  Does anyone out there understand what I'm saying?!  If so, can you please explain it all to me too!

I think I'm just tired of feeling like I'm the least on everyone's list.  I know I'm probably exaggerating, but whether or not its true, I still feel this way.  I assume someone would tell me that I'm feeling this way because of the abandonment I felt as a child and how growing up poor and being made fun of caused me to feel like people made fun of me all the time no matter what...blah, blah, blah...I suppose it's partially true.

One day I will be healed.  One day I'll learn to trust.  Or maybe it doesn't matter as long as I trust who matters...?  Or, maybe I don't even know how to trust them?

It's so so hard to cope up especially if you were a victim of bullying since childhood.

I was about to break down the other day...so I got out a piece of paper and wrote.

I just wrote and wrote and wrote.

I wrote down my fears, my irrational thoughts, my arguments within myself, and I wrote.

A Taste of God's Faithfulness


“Great is the LORD and most worthy ofpraise; his greatness no one can fathom.” Psalm 145:3

                Who can imagine travelling with a limited budget and all girls getaway?

                 We departed Cubao, Quezon City, Friday,May 17, 2013 at exactly 10:30am. Road an ALPS bus and headed to Lipa, Batangas.I must admit, we really don’t know each other personally, (came from all walks of life) but our hearts became one and united because of one cause-to have fellowship in Christ. From Lipa, we transferred a bus heading Nasugbu, still in Batangas. Then, blessings started to pour out.


            On our way to Nasugbu, a young boy named Jude came to our lives. He is just 12 years old but very friendly and have a golden heart. We really don’t know theplace we are going to but God sent this man to help us. At first, I personally doubted this young boy, a hesitant heart knowing the situations in thePhilippines but then, God let me see His goodness through this young boy. He helped us get a good bus though we were a chance passengers, but there were good samaritans offering us good seats and enjoyed our trip to their towns. We traveled almost 3hours going to an island, we didn’t have our lunch yet and tired from work before that trip, if only us, we might ended up sleeping but this boy who’s really chatty talked a lot, we laughed and listened to him without noticing that finally we’re on the place already.


            This instant tour guide became our companion during our trip. His goodness really ablessings to us. He cooked our food, he gathered stones, dried leaves to makefire, he even guided us in swimming, he shared stories even made us laugh. He even brought us pillows and mat to sleep. Truly, God is working through him. Even though, his adopted father got mad because he didn’t personally ask permission to stay with us, this young boy did a lot of good things to us. What I like about him is his open heart about Jesus. I believe God has a plan for his life and it’s not an accident that we’ve met him.

            On our day 2 of stay in that island, as early as around 8am, God allowed us tomeet a pastor from Wawa Community Christian Church together with his churchmates. Truly, God blessed us. Ptr. Rodel Alveyra made our day 2 stay such a memorable one. They have church activity in the island but he didn’t leaveus, he even toured us in another beach and let experienced the goodness of God. He even talked to us and ministered to us by sharing his faith and testimony that made us realized many things. I personally felt how blessed I am to have Jesus Christ in my life. Until he treated us with good, simple and delicious-fresh lunch. It was my first time to eat “ADOBONG OCTOPUS WITH GATA”, at first, I was hesistant, but when I tasted it, superb, I even forgot my diet and had my 2 rounds of plate eating in full.


            Another blessing came to us when we met our tricycle driver and we called him “tatay”. He is a christian and his stories blessed us. He drove us safely from Wawa to Brgy. Calayo.


                The name itself said so, Calayo. Yes, travelled almost an hour before going to another place but instead of us whining, we appreciate the greatness of God thru His nature.

            Finally,our trip has come to an end but not in spirit. We headed back to Manila but what we experienced there will always be our special memories.

          “Job 9:10 He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles thatcannot be counted.”

                 I’m running out of words so let me havethis moment to share my composed song when we’re on our way back to Manila.

Mighty
Lyrics and Music by: Princess Ivy Fernandez (Faith)

Verse 1:
I am at this age and time
When I’m figuring out
How to spend the rest of my life

Verse 2:
I think of the life that You led
As I learn about everything You did
And all that You said

Pre-Chorus:
And sometimes when I feel like I’mfalling apart
I get on my knees, close my eyes, andopen my heart
To all that You are

Chorus:
Because I can fly across the world
Travel on for so long and so far
Take the sky to touch the stars
Oh I can fly across the world
Stray away from the orient pearl
But no matter where I go
You will always be the mightiest Saviorthat I (they/we) will ever know

Refrain:
So I’ll sing, I’ll sing of Your love
In the hopes that those lost as me
Will follow the sound
And I know I can never find a betterway
To wake these young souls who areslowly going astray
And find brighter days
 
Repeat Chorus